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Engineering Jokes

Being an engineer can be very challenging at times, therefore it is desirable, but not essential, to develop a sense of humour during your time at the college. So why not assess yourself with these engineering jokes?  At  Guernsey College of Further Education we passionately believe that learning should be FUN!………so enjoy these jokes and enjoy your studies whatever you choose to do.

You get 2 marks for each of the jokes that you find funny and 1 mark if you smile.



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To the optimist, the glass is half-full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice the capacity as it needs to be.




What is the definition of an engineer?

Answer: Someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had, in a way you don’t understand.


What to give your favorite electrical engineer for his birthday?

Answer: Shorts.

(minus 2 points if you laughed at this very bad joke)










Helium and Argon walk into a bar and orders  beers, the bartender says “sorry we don’t serve inert gasses in here”. But Helium and Argon decide not to react.

There is a band called 1023MB. They haven’t had any gigs yet.

A computer programmer is told to “go to the shop and get a loaf of bread. If they have eggs get a dozen”. The programmer came back with 12 loaves. 





There are 10 types of people – those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

Hope you enjoyed these Jokes. Please send your jokes to If they are judged as suitable we will add them to this page.